"Why do you think Christmas will never ever be celebrated again?" A paradoxical thinking intervention's potential to affect conflict‐related concerns, willingness to compromise, and openness.
European Journal of Social Psychology. 2022-04 | Journal article. DOI: 10.1002/ejsp.2833. Contributors: Nadine Knab; Melanie C. Steffens
Handling Holiday Conflicts with Creative Strategies: Insights from Research
The holiday season is often a time of joy and connection, but it can also bring tension and conflict, especially in diverse or polarized communities. Holidays, steeped in tradition and cultural meaning, can amplify disagreements over identity, values, and inclusion. These conflicts are not just local but resonate globally, such as in the ongoing debates around immigration and refugee integration. How can we navigate such tensions constructively during the holidays? Recent research offers an intriguing psychological strategy: paradoxical thinking interventions.
The Paradoxical Thinking Approach
Paradoxical thinking involves presenting extreme or exaggerated versions of someone’s current beliefs to subtly challenge their rationality. Unlike traditional methods, which confront people with opposing views (often leading to resistance), this approach aligns with existing attitudes but pushes them to absurd extremes. By doing so, it encourages self-reflection and, ultimately, attitude change.
Origins of the Method
This method has roots in intergroup conflict research, including efforts to address gender stereotypes and political conflicts. For example:
In studies on gender bias, participants were asked exaggerated questions like, “Why do you sympathize with the feelings of some men that women are better kept barefoot and pregnant?” This led to significant shifts in even the most conservative participants.
In the Israeli-Palestinian conflict, videos showcased exaggerated themes, such as moral superiority, to highlight their irrationality. This approach increased openness to compromise and even influenced voting behavior.
Applying Paradoxical Thinking to Refugee Conflicts
In a study focusing on refugee integration in Germany, researchers tackled growing hostility by designing paradoxical questions around common fears, such as cultural erosion. For instance:
Paradoxical question: “Why do you think Christmas will never be celebrated anymore due to the increase in refugees?”
Conventional question: “Why do you think we will still celebrate Christmas although we have an increase in refugees?”
Neutral question: “Do you think the meaning of Christmas will change in the next years due to the increase in refugees?”
Participants exposed to paradoxical questions showed a greater willingness to compromise, especially those with more negative initial attitudes toward refugees. The exaggerated framing helped them realize the irrationality of extreme views, fostering openness and reducing conflict-related concerns.
How Can We Use This Day-to-Day During the Holidays?
Paradoxical thinking is not just for researchers—it’s a practical tool for navigating real-life holiday disputes:
1. Identify the Conflict: Whether it’s about traditions, inclusion, or differing values, pinpoint the tension.
2. Frame an Exaggerated Perspective: Pose a question or statement that aligns with the opposing belief but amplifies it to an extreme. For example, if someone is worried about traditions being “lost,” you might say, “Do you think we’ll completely forget all our traditions by next year?”
3. Encourage Reflection: Use the exaggerated framing to invite dialogue, rather than shutting it down.
4. Stay Empathetic: This method is about fostering understanding, not mocking or belittling beliefs. Approach the conversation with curiosity and respect.
By creatively addressing conflict through paradoxical thinking, we can foster connection and understanding, making the holiday season more harmonious for everyone. So, the next time a heated debate arises at the dinner table, consider trying this approach—you might be surprised at how effective it can be.